I can't bear to let u go now. And while I Was fighting this, feelings did fade becox back then u didn't let me feel that my leaving would change u. What's the reason that I am holding on? I am afraid no one will have this special love feeling, no one will dote and drive by with cab everytime I need them. I feel bliss and happiness. U gave me the innocent love and happiness within while I handle the cruel society and our issues. I should be more appreciative. But right now, things are getting worst, I am fighting time to be with u secretly yet not to disappoint them. These days when I fought to be with u, learning to know the leaving of u makes me grow more love and tOlerance towards u. Don't ask me when will I leave or how do I feel now. If I have a choice, I would ignore u and make u hate me. But I don't know how to start.Meanwhile, this family pressure will increase whenever they see anything abt us. I shouldn't have tested her tolerance and I could be less pressured.